About seven years ago, I was going through CNN’s website and I stumbled upon a very shocking news, one which cringed me and held me paused in unbelievable astonishment; a young lady named Janna Lynn Imel, who was in a wonderful, romantic relationship with her lover, who happened to be black. Being a white woman, an American, one wouldn’t expect there to be any form of friction in their relationship due to the rapid increase and acceptance of interracial relationships. In her case it was different. She was bitterly scolded by her very close friends and family, it was really serious to the extent that some of them stopped talking to her and showed disrespect to her black lover. In her own words, she said, "Racism is not dead, as many people believe. It still exists in our lives every day and it's time that more people take a stand."
Love is not a race, why color it?
Human feelings and need for care, affection and love is not tagged to a certain race or color, neither does it hang freely on the hinge of a particular group of people. Love is dynamic, anyone can fall in love with anyone, and it has to be known that interracial love affair has been proven to have an even deeper connection than the normal conventional relationship between people of the same race.
It is normal to have a parent concerned about their daughter or son, when it comes to interracial dating, perhaps because of the generalized perception, which could not be more wrong, but it must be said, that everyone deserves a chance to love and be loved. Most of the time it is not out of concern but open dislike for colored individuals. I am sure every book reader will agree with me that the front design and title of a book does not always justify or give the slightest clue to what we can likely find inside and many have learned this the hard way, letting go of people and things that actually matter because of their preconceived judgment of the person from the outward appearance, in this case, color. We do not choose whom we fall in love with or vice versa. Life is full of surprises and this is the spice, the intrigue we live daily for, that exciting unexpectedness of what happens next!
Do not miss the point! This article is not another racism tackling piece, at least not entirely, rather, it aims at bringing to the fore, how racism is affecting wonderfully woven interracial relationships across the globe and how couples are going through tough times because of their interracial affair from friends and families alike. Situations like that of Janna still happens and it is about time the world knew about it, at least for those who had little knowledge it still does. To build a better future for our children, we must teach them to love and accept people, regardless of their religion, race, or whatever differences exists. Our strength and perhaps the best way of loving, is in our diversity!
When you and your partner belong to different races, you'll want to make sure that your child gets the best of both cultures. It is important for an interracial couple to teach their child about both cultures as much as they can. Teaching children about cultures cultivates an attitude of self-love and self-acceptance because they know who they are. Interracial couples also need to come up with a plan to on how to raise their children to avoid instilling conflicting ideologies in them. If you do not have a plan yet, you need not worry. Read on and get the best tips for raising children in an interracial marriage
1. Allow your children to talk about skin color
Children born in an interracial marriage are bound to notice a difference in skin color from that of their parents. As they advance in age, they will begin asking questions about their color. As interracial parents, you ought to let them ask away till they understand the reason for the difference in color. Remember that children do not know the concept of race till we introduce it to them. Address skin color questions in a normal way. Be delicate in how you explain this concept to your child.
2. Let your child choose the culture he/she wants to identify with
In most cases, interracial children show interest in both cultures. One day they might be interested in your culture and the next in your partner's culture. This is perfectly normal, and you should be there to explain anything they need to know. Children may sometimes show preference to one culture. This should not cause friction between you and your partner. Teach your children to do what they feel most comfortable with. In time, you will find that they will begin blending in both cultures well in their identity.
3. Teach your child to accept mixed features
Children from interracial marriages take after both parents in most cases. You will find that a child will adopt some features from you and others from your partner. For instance, the child's hair color/texture might differ from the skin color. Work as a couple to help your child accept these features. Make him/her aware of the fact that these features are unique and they bring together his/her different cultural identities.
4. Uphold family traditions to strengthen bonds
Do not do away with all traditions from both cultures. Look for those that you can keep to strengthen your interracial marriage. These traditions will give your children a sense of identity and security. Create other traditions as a family, such as movie nights, to strengthen the family bond and help the children fit in both cultures better.
5. Avoid playing the blame game
Avoid blaming bad occurrences on cultural differences. Always remember that your differences in origin are not the reason for the wrong things that happen to your child. When you blame bad things on culture, you teach your children to hate part of themselves, and this affects their well-being.
Raising biracial children in an interracial marriage is easy when you work together with your partner. Teach your children to accept the uniqueness that comes with having two cultural identities. Use the tips we have discussed to bring out the best in your interracial children.
Many people find love at first sight, while others go on hundreds of dates before finding the right one. If you’re a white woman seeking a black man, you’ve just increased the odds that you’ll find someone special. But it can still be challenging to get that first coffee shop date and keep the momentum going so that the weekends are never lonely.
We offer some dating tips to help the white woman find the perfect black man.
1. Search every day. You’ll need to set aside time every day to search for black dates. It can take a lot of time to set up dates, so you want to constantly be searching through the new online listings and sending messages. Don’t forget to answer or review messages on a frequent basis too. You never know when you may see someone special, and you don’t want another white woman to snap them up.
2. Set a schedule for real dates. If you work a regular job, the best times to date are on Friday nights or the weekends. Set aside time in your schedule specifically for dating, and say no to everything else. If you wish to make finding a partner for life your priority, then you’re going to have to cut back on other activities. You may even wish to line up dates at the same venue, one right after the other. This helps to save time and effort. If you do this, you may need to give time between each date.
3. Get a makeover. Many women wear the same hairstyle and makeup they did as teenagers. It’s time to get a makeover and find a hairstyle and makeup that really suit your age. The right look can also take ages off your years. Most salons offer a makeover package that covers makeup and hair. Don’t forget to buy some new outfits for dating too. Combined together, all these changes can make you feel like a whole new woman to give you the confidence you need.
4. Maintain honesty. If you’re seeking someone for a longterm, rather than a short term relationship, let your dates know. It’s also helpful to let them know if you want kids or not. Perhaps you’ve already been married and have kids. Always offer open communication when you’re online messaging, or out in real world dates. Your black men will appreciate your honesty, and it will help them to open up about what they really want from life too. Remember to never make assumptions and be open to listening.
Are you a white woman who’s been searching some time for quality dates? Remember to maintain your focus and keep going. The more time you spend on your goal, the greater the odds that you’ll find someone special much sooner than if you sat around and complained about it. Soon you’ll experience dating success when you find the perfect black man for you!
Whether you’re black and he’s white, or vice versa, relationships can be a challenge. Besides getting past the stereotypes your friends, family, and colleagues may have, you’ll need to get to know each other from your first date.
1. Have fun. Remember that if you don’t have fun with your dating experiences, that others won’t find you fun at all. You can be serious about finding a lifetime partner, but shouldn’t be frowning and grumpy when on dates. Yes, you’re going to get some crazy messages. You can make a humorous response, or delete it. Remember to connect with other singles with the intention to have fun. Choose dates that want to go on fun outings or do things you’re interested in.
2. Proofread your dating profile. Even better, have a friend go over your dating profile. If it states you’re looking for black-white relationships, ensure that your profile is respectful and honest. You’ll attract a lot more people if you post photos of the real you, in a variety of settings, rather than ones that look like celebrities or movie stars.
3. Have a good sense of humor. Humor will get you through many difficult situations, but can also tell your potential partners that you try to effectively solve the problem, rather than simply lashing out in anger. This is especially beneficial as you try the online black white dating sites. No matter what site you’re on, there is always someone who doesn’t read your profile. In many instances, you may just wish to block and move on.
4. Do they have kinks? Many people are embarrassed to admit that they have kinks when they’re dating, but this is something that you need to bring forward at the beginning. Nothing is worse than having one partner into it, while the other is horrified. It’s important to maintain honesty right from the beginning, whether you’re trying interracial dating, or dating within your own heritage.
5. Maintain honesty. It can be tempting to drop 50 pounds from your dating profile while adding a few extra inches onto your height. Some people even lie about their ages. Unfortunately, the truth will show when you actually show up for a date in person. For most people, lying is the number one deal breaker. Did you know that most people don’t care about appearance, as long as you look attractive, smell good, and are fun to be around? Remember this point when you’re communicating online or in person.
Once you open yourself up to a black white relationship you’ll wonder why you didn’t try to date outside your culture or heritage before. The first thing to know is that black and white relationships really are no different than any other type. If you open yourself up to interracial dating , you’re going to meet many more people, and that means that you could just end up marrying your soul mate!
We all know that when it comes to love, there are no rules or limits. Love is a miracle, a magical feeling that can change your point of view, cure your loneliness and just simply – change your life.
Then why in 2018, there is still an issue to be in a relationship or in marriage with a person from another race?
Even in the modern, nowadays societies, black – white dating seems to be weird and strange.
Isn’t it about loving, caring and understanding? How is it connected to the skin color? What is a black-white romance? Isn’t it just a ROMANCE?
There are many couples around the world that are facing this problem in their everyday life and, as they say, sometimes it just strengthens their relationship with the partner, but in the other hand it moves them away from their family and friends.
These kinds of couples talked about their love life and shared some experiences, thoughts, and questions that are asked on daily basis such as: “Why don’t you date a partner within your race? Is there a problem with the cultural differences? Do you really have something in common?” etc.
Even the gay community, that seems to be more open-minded, is dealing with the same problem.
But the answer from all of them is that the one thing that matters is love. Interracial marriage should not be weird, interracial couples are just like the other couples.
It is the society that makes pressure about every simple thing and makes rules where there should be none. We are all just human being, it is the science that defines us by our DNA, but it has nothing to do with our skin color.
So, if you don’t believe in international relationships, well it is probably not for you then.