Arabian Queen...you have to learn to discern the wheat from the chaff...Our society tends to breed insecurities, hence, your friend needed the satisfaction of knowing that you were still interested in him...once you bite the bait, he had what he needed to survive another day. Be true to yourself...try to see what's in front of you and not what you want to see.
Of course I know what I want!.....sometimes, hang on, no, all the time - I definately know what I want.......or do I? Maybe, no actually I don't. WAIT - yep, I remember now....oh hang on - Damn, I'm all confused now, silly little woman that I am!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Hello, I'm new on here and thought I'd jump in. I know what I want. I don't think that some men know what they want? They say they want someone with strength, someone who's aggressive, independent, blunt, honest, bold etc. etc. etc. For example...I ran into an old friend of mine on another site who I have not seen for 13 years...we liked each other back then, no one said anything, years go by, we meet up, he makes comments, writings on the walls, throws hints...well, went as far as saying let's start a life together, I wait it out a couple of days, then I bite, and BLAM...he gets scared and runs. He doesn't even want to hang out with me as a friend...what in the h*ll are men afraid of.
I think that chances are most women have tried being aggressive at least once and scared someone away and those same women are just sitting back and waiting for what they want to come to them.
Sunshower write: I guess I'm in the minority then.
Sometimes I honestly don't know what I want. Sometimes I want a relationship, sometimes I want to be single. This leads to quite a few confused and hurt men, which I try to avoid.
I hate to admit it, but I guess I'm one of those "confused" females the topic starter was thinking about.
I guess I'm messing it up for all of us huh? lol
You are not messing up a thing. And at your age, why should you have to make a decision that should last forever? I think if we were all honest, we feel the same way you do Sun. I want to be open and available to a relationship and not jaded by past experiences. I hope I can succeed as experience proves a hard barrier to overcome.
Hmmm I guess to be fair, they should also ask if men really know what they want?
Hmmmm... I even question myself on that sometimes? God, life is too complicated... I just want a GOOD, easygoing lady who wants my bod (hehe just had to throw that in) and loves to have intellectual conversations ...someone whom makes my day and I can make hers in return...yada yada yada...
Wait, I guess I really do know what I want... I guess I'm simply fishing without a rod and reel! Geez I always forget something (friggn' alzheimers).
I think sleepless has a good point. Men giving women what "they" think we want, but generally not having a clue. But the flip side is also, some women don't have a clue what they want either. We all want a date/mate/partner that can carry on a converstion, makes us laugh, show us respect and make us "feel good". That is not limited just to women.
Diana007 write: Life is funny like this. That even thouigh we know what we want and work hard to attain it, sometimes we never come close to achieving our goals. Case and point.... what if I winked at 3 different very attractive guys. With the goal/hope/prayer of a date and didn't get a response. That is a goal not attained. I knew what I wanted, but was unable to attain my goal due to circumstances beyond my control. And then by the same token 300 guys wink me all of which I am not interested in. They are not able to attain their goal either. Because in order for them to attain their goal I would have to compromise on what I want. Which is not an option. So though I know what I want the opportunity to attain it has not yet presented itself. So the question do women really know what they want is maybe an oximoron. A more realistic question may be ~ HOW DO WOMEN GO ABOUT GETTING WHAT THEY REALLY WANT! And when you find the answer to that question please let me know so that I can go back and at least have a dream date with someone I am really interested in for once!
I can't help you, since those things that others have more control over than I, are the things falling into that 0.1% of wants & needs of my previous post.
But I'm standing right here beside you sis, waiting to hear what the person who DOES have that answer has to say.