GHETTO WHITE GIRLS VS REGULAR WHITE GIRLS Message board Forward to friends

  • View author's info Posted on Nov 07, 2005 at 07:24 AM


    Exactly Keihan. This was the last paragraph of my first post on this topic:

    "The point I'm trying to make is to make sure not to always assume the people in question are being fake. Yeah, there's a clear difference between somebody who's trying too hard via cultural affectation, and somebody who grew up in and can relate to the culture. Just my 2 cents plus sales tax."

    Welcome to the band PDX!!!
  • View author's info Posted on Nov 07, 2005 at 06:18 AM


    Sinflowerz write:
    What if they really are that way? Some people aren't acting. I wish people would quit with the "trying to be white," or "trying to be black." I don't know how many times I have been accused of talking white, or trying to be white. Its just where I raised. I would figure people on an interracial dating site wouldn't see things so black and white.


    Actually, the point you just made is exactly what we are talking about. Folks accusing you of not being "black enough" or "acting white" because of the way you talk or act.

    However, I think acting and talking ghetto for most of the youth today is a choice. It is also that many parents don't take an active parenting approach to their children. No matter a child's race, they aren't going to go far if they don't meet a certain social etiquette.

    A good example is the following:

    Have you ever called a company's customer service dept and gotten a rep who has such a foreign accent or such street talk that you could not understand much of what they said. I certainly have. It is so frustrating that often I don't get my problem resolved through those channels.

    I definately have issue with street slang etc etc. But I do not conclude this to be a racial thing. However I don't necessarily view it as an uneducated thing either. Some of it surely can be, but not all of it. Much of that which I see today seems to be by matter of choice. Kids that watch too much Eminem and MTV try to emulate the language of their favorite stars. They have no idea how this seems to degrade their intelligence to the outside world. I think Chris Rock and Bill Cosby have hammered this topic as well.
  • View author's info Posted on Nov 07, 2005 at 06:08 AM


    Sinflowerz write:
    What if they really are that way? Some people aren't acting. I wish people would quit with the "trying to be white," or "trying to be black." I don't know how many times I have been accused of talking white, or trying to be white. Its just where I raised. I would figure people on an interracial dating site wouldn't see things so black and white.

    Exactly. Who's to say that a white person who acts "ghetto" is being "fake"? Maybe that's just how they are.
  • View author's info Posted on Nov 04, 2005 at 10:36 PM


    I have to add my little opinion in here. Okay. Im white. I have 2 kids by a black man. (yes, same dad thank you very much). I can not even tell you how many times people have asked me WHY I had kids with a 'brotha' (whatever). Does it even matter? I personally prefer to date outside my race. Not sure why, but you won't hear any of what some call 'ghetto slang' or anything like that coming from me. To me, there is no real 'white talk' or 'black talk' people just talk. If they acted like they had any common sense or an education, we might be able to understand what they say. Oh, just so you know...that comment is not meant to be rude or offensive to anyone, so if you take it that way....I am sorry :(
  • View author's info Posted on Nov 04, 2005 at 06:33 PM


    I agree Slide...but I think it takes a certain amount of maturity and self confidence and courage to realize that you don't want to be a lemming and your OWN path is the right one for you.

    By the way, I can play a mean tambourine and sing reasonably well. LOL
  • View author's info Posted on Nov 04, 2005 at 05:59 PM


    Yeah Keihan, I don't understand the logic of (moreso, the lack there of) thinking. Truth be told, I'm not really sure I want to. I learned to think for myself at an early age, and when that caused me to become an outcast....well, I considered that a small price to pay to march to my own drummer. It's the old analogy of "if everybody else jumps off a cliff, are you gonna do the same?" I believe in being myself and allowing others to do the same.

    I for one, will continue to be pro-education and anti-ignorance. I will NOT dumb-down to appease the lowest common denominator. Way too many people have protested, marched, fought and died so that it could be that way.

    Nice guitar BTW. We should start a band! LOL
  • View author's info Posted on Nov 04, 2005 at 04:18 PM


    Great posts Slide, I agree man! I don't see these bahaviors and/or fashions as a racial thing and not sure why people tie that stuff into race. Maybe they watch too much TV hehe
  • View author's info Posted on Nov 04, 2005 at 04:12 PM


    BTW, the whole saggy/baggy pants "style" began in the penitentiary, where prisoners weren't allowed to wear belts. This was because if they weren't using them for weapons to kill each other with, they were hanging themselves with them.

    So if anyone wants to think I'm acting white because my pants aren't falling off my @$$, then I say, I'm not ANYBODY'S prisoner......literally AND figuratively!!!
  • View author's info Posted on Nov 04, 2005 at 04:00 PM


    This has been the very thing I've been railing against for TOO long-what the h*** constitutes "acting black/white"? Is there a handbook issued to us-depending on skin color-that gives guidelines on how we're supposed to behave? I dunno, I can only imagine if a martian from outer space came to earth and tried to act "human", he'd have a heckuva time trying to choose between the black/white/brown/yellow/red guidebooks. Sheesh!!

    I grew up in the as-ghetto-as-it-gets South Bronx. Yet I NEVER let ANYBODY REGARDLESS of SKIN COLOR dictate to me how I should THINK, ACT, DRESS or SPEAK.

    I can't stand IGNORANCE....PERIOD!

    I am what I am, if you don't like it I don't give a d***!

    I think cypangui (sp?) had a point when he mentioned that maybe some people ARE looking for a stereotype when they meet someone from a particular race. Bully for them. If you're gonna be FAKE, don't talk to me! I'm gonna "keep it real" alright..... especially REAL to myself. My hat's off to anybody who does the same, no matter what their peers or society tells them.
  • View author's info Posted on Nov 04, 2005 at 02:38 PM


    Aren't the phrases "acting white" or "acting Black" two of the most antipathic ever?

    What a love of dicotomies characterizes modern society!

    What about "acting East Asian" or "acting Sephardim"? How could I "act Aymara"? Am I "acting white" by listening to Classical music? Am I "acting Black" if I rap a song or dance hip hop?

    Arrrgh.

    Can't understand these silly humans.

    Can a Black person "act Black" or is s/he just being "himself/herself" when s/he's adjusting to the stereotypes?

    Everything seems to work in categories, defined by language. The danger is that nowadays there is this propensity to turn such categories into pigeonholes.

    And people dared to tell me how wrong I was when I remarked that, to increase one's dating prospects, it is better if you adjust to the stereotypes proper to your looks!

    Well, I reaffirm what I said. I know, because I've traveld a lot and I've been through hell and I'm psychologically old enough to be dead already: most people out there, no matter how wonderful their intentions, still see you through their own cultural biases.

    Which means a "race"/culture mismatch may well be the dating kiss of death.

    That's why being happy with *yourself* no matter what is so important: because for some people, being yourself means being forever alone.

    And that may be no such a bad thing. You'll need to be strong, that's all.
  • View author's info Posted on Nov 04, 2005 at 07:11 AM


    caramel_princess write:


    Exactly! Does "acting Black" mean wearing baggy jeans and talking with street slang and blasting rap music in your car? So, if a Black person does not behave this way, he is not "acting Black"? And "acting white" means speaking proper English and dressing conservatively? Wow! That's news to me! It's a shame that we keep putting people in a box based on their skin color! IMHO there is no "acting Black" or "acting White". It's more about the culture you grew up in.


    I agree. I have just as many white kids in my neighborhood behaving in this "ghetto" fashion as I do black kids.

    There is also sometimes a threatening element to their body language. Granted there may be no intent, but they wonder why people distrust them. It is because many people loathe their behavior.

    It also seems to be that many who adopt this behavior (and I say "adopt" because it is not a natural, born, behavior for any racial group) seem to wear that chip on their shoulder to strike fear in common people. They believe that through fear they gain respect, however it is a false sense of respect. Respect is something you earn not extort.

    I don't fear anyone, however I do pity them in that if they don't grow up at some point they will never enter the real world.

    An example: My daughter and son were over at this one boy's house (friend of my daughter) and his brother (white kid) is about 3-4 years older than my 14 year old daughter. Now, I am a man who can read a person like a book with no words ever having to be said. Anyhow when I arrived to pick up my kids, this older boy stood there in front of me as my daughter introduced me to the kids. He didn't say a word but I could read it in his face and behavior. He was scanning me in a demeaning and threatening way. Now, mind you, I might be small but I used to kickbox and I can hold my own (well it's been awhile LOL). But, I know the power of intimidation and using intelligence as firm footing over an opponent. It will win you a fight in a heartbeat. This kid was standing there disrespecting me and be it beyond me to allow this to happen. What kind of example do I send to my children if I don't show them that you must take a stand in life when people try to put you down, take advantage of you or whatnot? My kids know I'm nonviolent, but they also know I don't take crap from nobody.

    Anyhow, I looked down at this short turd and put my nose in his face, looked him square in his eyes and said "You got a problem son?" His eyes turned away and he said, real gruffly, "No!" I said, "Good, because no child disrespects me. Understand?"... Under his breath he said "sure"

    I later learned that he is a big troublemaker...surprise surprise... my kids won't be visiting there anytime soon, again.

    I just find this ridiculous attitude, these kids have taken on, as being so ridiculously superficial and barbaric. It makes me wonder if we truly didn't descend from the neandrethal rather than cromagnon man. Brains always wins over brawn. That is why Cromagnon survived and the Neandrethal went extinct.
  • View author's info Posted on Nov 04, 2005 at 06:22 AM


    keihan write:

    It could also be brought up that acting "ghetto" tends to carry with it some maculine or macho qualities, body language and, to a degree, a level of youthful immaturity so perhaps we, simply, prefer women whom behave more femininely and perhaps more maturely.

    No Keihan. Atleast in my opinion, "acting ghetto" does not spell 'masculinity' but rather it spells ignorance and lack of education, which is far from being a 'turn-on'. I, like you, prefer a man who uses proper grammar and can hold an intelligent conversation. Leave the ghetto men to the ghetto women.
  • View author's info Posted on Nov 04, 2005 at 06:11 AM


    MrRSVP write:
    Could somebody PLEASE tell me what does it mean to act "white" or act "black".

    Does acting white mean acting proper and correct and acting black mean acting ghetto. I just want to know.

    Exactly! Does "acting Black" mean wearing baggy jeans and talking with street slang and blasting rap music in your car? So, if a Black person does not behave this way, he is not "acting Black"? And "acting white" means speaking proper English and dressing conservatively? Wow! That's news to me! It's a shame that we keep putting people in a box based on their skin color! IMHO there is no "acting Black" or "acting White". It's more about the culture you grew up in.
  • View author's info Posted on Nov 04, 2005 at 05:30 AM


    MrRSVP write:
    Could somebody PLEASE tell me what does it mean to act "white" or act "black".

    Does acting white mean acting proper and correct and acting black mean acting ghetto. I just want to know.


    I think acting Ghetto is just acting ..Ghetto. I don't think there is a racial line there. Ghetto is kind of a turn off for me however. It may be because it seems like an uneducated behavior and I enjoy a woman whom can hold her own in an intellectually stimulating conversation and even debate. Proper grammar is definately a big big plus... and street slang turns me off to a large degree. I think it is a matter of taste, but I know how the black gentlemen feel whom find it a turn off when their women act "ghetto". It could also be brought up that acting "ghetto" tends to carry with it some maculine or macho qualities, body language and, to a degree, a level of youthful immaturity so perhaps we, simply, prefer women whom behave more femininely and perhaps more maturely.
  • View author's info Posted on Nov 03, 2005 at 08:06 PM


    This is a very important topic to say the least. All I can say in my defense is that I am attracted to black men, end of story. I will not be someone that I am not nor will I act like someone that I am not just to get a guy. I wish the world could just forget about the color of one's skin and realize that we are all people looking for that one special person that we are attracted too. In my case, I am attracted to black men, the color our skin plays no part in that, but through my experience, I have found that black men are much more attentive and confident and that is what I like. Not to mention, when I am with a black man that I am attracted too and we hold hands, there is nothing that can compare to seeing our entwined hands, talk about a color contrast, I think it is beautiful. We are all human beings, we all bleed red blood and for the selected few who only looks at the color of our skin and turns their nose up, well then, stay within your own race, but don't look down on us who are open and willing to explore other possibilities, it's our choice and when push comes to shove, we are all human beings and have our own prefences.
  • View author's info Posted on Nov 03, 2005 at 12:16 PM


    Could somebody PLEASE tell me what does it mean to act "white" or act "black".

    Does acting white mean acting proper and correct and acting black mean acting ghetto. I just want to know.
  • View author's info Posted on Nov 03, 2005 at 09:38 AM


    kashmirkat write:


    As does a black man who tries to act white. DOUBLE YUCK!!


    Here, here! I second that motion.
    Now let that be a lesson to all of the phony and fake people. NO FRONTIN! Be REAL!!! Peace. LOL
  • View author's info Posted on Nov 03, 2005 at 07:59 AM


    bigsamxl2000 write:
    i cant stand white girls that wanna be "black".It puts me off.yuck


    As does a black man who tries to act white. DOUBLE YUCK!!
  • View author's info Posted on Nov 02, 2005 at 04:34 PM


    cocolicious write:

    Keihan,

    Very nice picture!


    LOL... Thanks Coco!

    I usually hate my pictures, but this one is "ok" I guess ;)

    Looks like your pretty close to me, I'm just west of you in good ole Ft Wayne, IN. :D

    It's a FLAT and visually boring place really hehe.
  • View author's info Posted on Nov 02, 2005 at 12:12 PM


    PDX I certainly agree that plain brown wrappers hold many surprises. Like an undertaker who does knitting, a minister who enjoys skydiving. For me I really love to undo a plain brown wrapper.

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