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Posted on Tue, May 26, 2015 06:17 PM

Its so frustrating when I get in a relationship and I find out my boyfriend isn't who he pretended to be. It's frustrating when I get in a relationship and my bf doesn't understand how to be faithful. Why is it so difficult to avoid temptation. Why am I asking too much when I don't want you hanging around a female that likes you. Why do you feel the need to entertain other women. Am I not enough when I love you more than I'm loving myself???


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_Aurie
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Posted on Wed, Nov 02, 2016 11:39 AM

Don't ever love a man more than you love yourself, crazy as it sounds !  I have been through the ropes myself, believe me - but I would much rather be single than having my heart ripped out.


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Posted on Tue, Feb 09, 2016 07:26 AM

You're gorgeous, and clearly very introspective, anyone would be a fool to cheat on you.

 

That said, loving your partner more than you love yourself might not be such a good idea. I've learned it's easier to love your partner in a deep, abiding, and mature way if you love yourself wholly and completely first.


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Posted on Mon, Jun 22, 2015 12:05 PM

Aurie,

 

 

You remind me of my girlfriends. Most of them have never been married and I always offer them a bit of advice from my end of the spectrum. If it isn't that great in the beginning, it's not going to be much better at the end. Meaning, if you're already noticing issues with honesty, fidelity, finances, etc. during what should be the golden period (on your best behavior trying to impress each other) it surely isn't going to improve once you settle in. I think we try to give people the benefit of the doubt or suspend disbelief entirely too much. This is why I made the tough decision to end my relationship. The only thing changing was my hair color -- from black to grey. Life is too short to standstill hoping for someone else to change. I don't regret the time I spent in my relationship but it something that will definitely not be repeated because there are too many good men out there. 


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Posted on Mon, Jun 22, 2015 11:25 AM

As someone who had a marriage end due to infidelity in my ex-wife's part, I know exactly how you feel. There's no worse feeling, in my opinion.

 

Don't let this define you. Don't let it tarnish future, possibly amazing opportunities. Even though it's scary, give that next person the benefit of the doubt. You are stronger than this and it will pass.


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Posted on Wed, Jun 03, 2015 08:37 AM

Sometimes venting can be good, so go ahead and vent away. And you're right to be skeptical about being in a relationship with a man who won't be faithful to you, or treat you with the respect that you deserve to be treated with. 



If you don't stand for something, then you will fall for anything.
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